The last song on Falco's album Emotional is called The Kiss of Kathleen Turner. It is a very odd song indeed.The lyrical highlight must be:
Issos, Cannae, Katalaunische Felder, Mount Greek, Austerlitz, Waterloo, Verdun, Stalingrad, Hiroshima, Nagasaki, Harrisburg, Brokdorf, Zwentendorf, Cattenom, Wackersdorf, Tschernobyl,
Kathleen, can you hear me babe kathleen, do you know what I'm talking about I'm just talking about Not the first kiss of my life I'm talking about ... our planet ... Kathleen!
What the hell! Shallow people shouldn't try to be deep. How is Chernobyl connected with Waterloo? Why is he talking about our planet?
People are unkind. Like me about Falco. Like people about Kathleen Turner. I found out that the reason everyone slagged her off in the 90s after a stellar career in the 80s was because she had rheumatoid arthritis. In the papers there was specualtion about drugs, food and booze, but she actually had arthritis. Nasty. Further proof that God is either a bastard or an ancient Greek (hubris).
Here's what The Times wrote about George IV when he died:
“There never was an individual less regretted by his fellow-creatures than this deceased king. What eye has wept for him? What heart has heaved one throb of unmercenary sorrow? ... If he ever had a friend — a devoted friend in any rank of life — we protest that the name of him or her never reached us”
When he came to throne he was 111kg.
"George's favorite breakfast reputedly consisted of two roast pigeons, three beefsteaks, a bottle of white wine, a glass of champagne, two glasses of port, and one of brandy."
The Times also concluded:
"he would always prefer a girl and a bottle to politics and a sermon."
He sounds like a perfectly sensible anecdote to politics, sermons and causes. I would like to think our Governor General has similar inclinations. The thin, puritanical and righteous should be in charge of nothing.
George IV is famous now as Hugh Laurie's Prince Regent in Blackadder III. When I was in England with my good friend Matt we went to see George's beach residence at Brighton. It was ridiculous and opulent. Which is how I come back to Falco.
If you compare the portraits I think the similarities are more striking than the differences.I return to my original statement: life is absurd, unfair and ends unpleasantly.
If The Times wrote your obituary in a bad mood what would it say?
1 comment:
"He was obviously into barbershop singing, but was hopeless at looking after children. He played the cello and only talked to people with broken limbs whose daughters found pleasure in farting on his leg. He drank too much chardonnay and probably did other things, but who really cares."
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