An Unfinished Autobiography


In view of the fact that there is much friction over Lenin among the soldiers of the battery, please let us have the earliest possible reply. What is his origin? Where had he been? If he had been in exile, what for? How did he return to Russia and what is he doing at present, that is, are his acts doing us good or harm?


Letter of the soldiers’ committee of the 8th Horse Artillery Battery (army in the field) sent to the Petrograd Soviet. April 24 (May 7), 1917.


Lenin began a reply:


I reply to all these questions, except the last one, because it is for you to judge whether or not my activity is doing you any good. My name is Vladimir Ilyich Ulyanov. I was born in Simbirsk on April 10, 1870. In the spring of 1887, my elder brother Alexander was executed by Alexander III for an attempt on his life (March 1, 1887). In December 1887, I was arrested for the first time and expelled from Kazan University for students’ disturbances; I was then banished from Kazan. In December 1895, I was arrested for the second time for Social-Democratic propaganda among the workers of St. Petersburg....


So, key dates: 1870, 1887, 1895. Following the same principles my own autobiography would read:


My name is John-Paul Marshall Powley. I was born in Paraparaumu on 9 March, 1973. In the Spring of 1990 I had glandular fever and wasn't going to school for my last term in seventh form. In December 1998 I was spending Christmas in London after teaching in Japan for seven months.


Pretty good. I don't think you need to add to this in any way.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Come on JY, I don't think you picked the most important episodes in your life! Vlad was trying to show that his path was set at an early age. Yours would read more like:
I reply to all these questions, except the last one, the words from which I will organise into a wordfind.
My name is John-Paul Marshall Powley. I was born in Paraparaumu on 9 March, 1973. In 1978 I'd started school and was given an exercise book that was to become what could be described as my first social studies exercise book. By 1983 I had already acquired various sets of coloured pencils. In 1990 I went to the school ball sporting a perm, even though I hadn't got around to wallpapering the walls in our house. In 1991 I discovered that you could study social studies at university; I wondered if they supplied a more intelligent looking coloured pencil. In 2006 I found my way to Nuova Lazio High and was sent immediately to F Block. I met the music teacher and told him he was an idiot. He grinned, as one would expect an idiot to do. In 2008 I acquired a badge that said "Wassup!" and I somehow felt better.

R

ps. I am not the only person in the music department. There's also Ernie the talking rat; and the roofers.